|Deviant Login||Shop||Join deviantART for FREE||Take the Tour|
AnxietyHow it comes to you and grabs your neck with
its cold bare invisible hands; squeezes your
air ways till you can't even possibly
You do everything possible to get it to stop
choking you but it doesn't seem to budge
no matter what you do because it's stuck to
you like Velcro.
When it leave you, the river of relief rushes
through your veins; heart beats begin to slow
down when the relief gets to your heart.
Your lips are numb from trying to get air into
your lungs that is just pushing that air
out of your body.
Flaws and ImperfectionsPeople look at flaws and imperfections to
be a bad thing, when in the deepest realities
they're really a good thing. They can make
you love a person more then you did when you
ever first layed eyes on them.
When you add up all of the imperfections
and flaws you have a human; a person that
isn't perfect to begin with but you,
they are the pure definition of perfect.
To know that this person is one of a kind
and that no one else on this earth can
have the same flaws and imperfections as
them makes you want to keep them forever.
My FriendYou have always been there for me when I was
a distressed that over whelmed everything;
listening to the rants that seemed like Taylor
Swift wrote about in songs that became number
one hits; never once did you every have the
thought that doubt came through my head in the
murky mornings when the crows are yelling
annoyance out their beak.
Suffering through things that make you want doubt
humanity itself because on how stupid it can be;
you do this not because you want to but for the
reason that you care for me and my happiness.
With every smile that I make; makes you happy
but what you don't know is what when
your happy, I'm happy. Never have you once
complained about anything at all, not even about
the things that you hate the most that I love the most.
You respect all of my wishes and support me in
every way as possible; when I'm about to give up
on myself you there to pull me off the ground
like a mother helping her hurt child off the dirt
and dust left from the sand; cleaning the wo
To like peopleI've grown to like people, but the right
kind of people. The people that make you
feel like your on top of the world;
that nothing's going to stop you when
you're with them. To look into eyes
and see their soul spelling out
This is what happens when the
hopeless romantic takes over.
The dreamer side.
Lifetime of InfinitiesWhen I close my eye, there you
are with that charming smile of
I find myself smile too; it's
like you took a brush and
started painting that curl of
lips on my face.
Oh, how I miss you gently press
your lips on mines, in minutes
sparks set off fireworks that
I've only seen once in my life;
and those where with you my dear.
You were the only one that
could make me smile like that;
to fill me up with so much joy
and wonderment that made me
feel like I was on top of the world.
But your gone and you will
never come back because of this
stupid treacherous this that
we all call cancer, how it eats
people one by one till everyone
has nothing left.
I thank you for all of those
infinities to last me a lifetime
even though I can't share
them with you.
The PendulumSwinging back, forth and in life,
I begin to learn this knowledge that
I have never knew had ever existed
until my father spoke of it.
From then on, this was the kind of
knowledge that I began to craved for
more and more; I soon realize that I
could never grasp this lore because
of the lack of maturity that I had
but then again I was only a child;
with every motion that one single
ball makes is a year with in, I was
learn a small chunks of the
proficiency that everyone else had
already possessed in there time.
More knowledge that started to grow
and grow as the synaptic connections
started to connected in my brain;
making these links that I nevermore
even fathom the thought that these
could come rushing into me.
Years past by me like a page getting
flip through a book, I've become
wiser over the years because of the
pendulum that knowledge has.
Good-byeThere you are with those brown eyes, your charming smile and that hair of yours. How I longed for you to be mines one day; the feelings that gave me a happiness; with each step I take, vibrations shooting across the floor like fireworks.
But I know that you will never feel the same way about me, no matter how many times I try to convince myself that you might would. I've learned to except it the very hardest but, there is always going to be that little piece of my heart that will be broken of how you meant everything to me. You were my sun and stars; there was never a moment in my mind where it started to ponder over the thought of you, during the summer restless nights.
To you, I was nothing; nothing like the different mineral in the sand getting washed over my the waves of the ocean to the titanic laying hopelessly in the depths of the dark. The shy girl that was a ghost on the side of the room, you too began to believe it along with the worst nightmares in the silent night. I rip my
FriendsFriends; those are the people that are
there for you when you feel the world
has turned it's back on you.
They give you that little piece of
hope when you think it's all gone;
they know how to turn a frown into a
smile but, most of all they love you
no matter what because we are humans.
And humans love each other no matter
how many times we hurt each other
people that we care about the most in
Not your HeartLying in my bed, in the silence of the night,
my head is overwhelmed with one, single, giant
thought right in this lone moment. You, my dear,
you are the thought that is swimming laps
through my head.
How do I even begin to wonder if you do love
me; it feels like your giving me so many mix
signals that I am beginning to question if my
eyes are playing little tricks on me. Or are
you just unsure if you should take the leap.
You don't want to feel the pain that could
over rule every emotion that you have no
desire to feel in the first place. If
that's so, then I could never want to break
a heart like yours, it has way to much
wonderment for me to want to break when
there is so much more for me to explore.
The uniqueness that your soul has makes it
so hard, for me to resist not wanting to go
look into your eyes to see your whole world
lit up in a matter of seconds; maybe it's
just the reflection of me every time that I
look at you, how you can make me smile
effortlessly because of
Death isn't a fresh perspectiveI saw my mother
swallowing something small
when I was just a child
The anguish in her eyes
faded, as she told me
it was just a
with a little extra kick
maybe years later,
that's how I convinced
to swallow fifteen,
give me a fresh perspective;
in the end,
my breath reeked
instead of mint.
fall in love with (splitting hairline fractures)we swallow blues instead
of talking them out. oh,
kids like us are specters,
spectacles: boys counting
rib(cage)s & (de)composing
don't you hate
is a vessel
we're deities or tomb-raiders; no
in-betweens for writers these days
Dark SideThere's another side of me
A side I barely show
It's my dark side
And my pride
The time I showed it to my friends
They were shocked, worried
I will tell you what they said
Decide for me
If these are what you call
One said 'just be happy'
One said 'that isn't true!'
One said ' but I've got it much worse'
One said 'don't be annoying'
One said nothing at all
Only One listened
That could be you
This is my dark side
The one that tells the truth
It makes me write
It keeps my dreams
It is everything I have
But no one knows
i'm not going to lie and say she was perfect.her skin was spotted with what she passed off as freckles,
but what were really scars from a thousand summer suns
as she ran about outside,
climbing trees and treading rivers,
pretending to be an american bomber
in the midst of WWII.
she kept crimson stains on pearl pink lips,
which always had the habit of getting on her teeth
because she put on make-up after dressing in her car
and ordering coffee in every way she hated it
as she drove to the record store three times a day,
ignoring her job downtown.
she owned four and a half hairbrushes exactly,
i took count on the first night i stepped into that whirl-wind room,
though her lopsided up-dos of messy blonde hair revealed just how much her fingers
never broke the dust.
she had these lovely fragile hands
that showed each and every vein and bone,
the type of hands made for tearing boys like me apart.
how could i have even expected to survive,
a paper poet
held against a reckless flame?
I died todayI died today
Took my own life
I was tired
I was desperate
And now I'm dead
People never cared
So I left them behind
Now a new life awaits
Beyond the gates of Hell
each kiss carries
context and content,
sad eyes pour into mine
like a swimming pool
being filled with angels’ tears.
i cup her face in my hands,
trying to hold all of the water
that escapes her
as i gently kiss her forehead.
i will cradle her cerebrum
and maintain our composure.
i will protect you.
refers to the hands on a clock,
as well as the anatomical.
and this kiss is subtle,
but it represents our passing of time.
i started this with my mother at 13,
and only a few embraces away from 18.
with our fingers locking
themselves to adolescence.
i never have visibly blushed,
but i swear my flushed cheek
burned where your left your lips
for nearly a lifetime.
at least that’s what it felt like.
i kissed the blinds
that covered the windows
of your soul
to let you know
the sun still shone
even if your eyes were close
bone brittlethey say that love is like an ocean and you can feel the waves
filling up your stomach, saltwater rolling against your nervous system.
they say that when you're in love and you curl your toes in pleasure
you can feel wet sand between them, warm against the skin.
but your love was like a desert.
our love left me parched, throat raw, the taste of grit in my mouth.
my stomach empty, growling for some sort of sustenance,
something you always refused to give me when i needed it most.
you told me you loved me, like a mirage floating amongst our heat.
if love is like an ocean then you were loneliness, i guess.
every saltwater tear you cried evaporated into thin air.
you were the Sahara and i was the Atlantic.
we collided every time we met.
Puzzle heartYour heart is a complete puzzle; the pieces
that make the puzzle up are the things that
we love and mean the most to us in our life.
Sure the edge pieces of the puzzle aren't
going to be painful as the ones in the
middle because, those are the few things
that really mean the most to you and you
don't want to lose those pieces in your life.
You can try all you want to try to make a new
piece to fit in the place of where the old
one was or you can try to shove something
there to fill in the gap that piece left but
after the piece is gone you can replace no
matter what you do because nothing is the
same with out that one single piece. It was
the once piece of the whole puzzle that kept
holding everything together in your life.
Keep in Touch!
Endorell-Taelos is very well known within the community for her selfless giving and gracious community spirit. Since joining DeviantART over seven years ago, Alicia has continued to make a positive impact on many deviants. Her helpful and thoughtful approach was one of her finest attributes when serving as a Community Volunteer, and this has continued throughout the many contests which Alicia provides on a regular basis. As we approach our Birthday celebrations, we can't... Read More